There’s nothing like Christmas morning. I still remember one in particular when, at the age of five, I lingered over a shiny pink ribbon for a moment, thrilled at the gleaming silver wrapping paper, savored the anticipation of finding what I’d hoped was inside (a Betsy Wetsy doll), then succumbed to the loss of all self-control and dove in.

Who’d have thought that a doll that could wet her diapers would be such a thrill? And for those of you who know me, you can get up off the floor and stop laughing now. What can I say? I was into dolls at that age. In hindsight, I realize that it was just as a big a thrill to imagine the contents of that box and savor those moments of anticipation – i.e., prolong the ecstasy just before the orgasmic rush of tearing off the pink bow and silver paper (forgive the analogy) – as it was to posses my little heart’s desire.

Betsy and I were inseparable till my youngest brother, Matt, was born. I quickly realized that he had much easier hair to style, was considerably cuter, and without the merest soupçon of envy, was possessed of intriguing equipment that Betsy wasn’t. Besides that, she just floated like a dead fish in the bathtub, so the thrill was gone.

LEADERS OF THE PACK-AGE:  Apple  &  Tiffany

I digress. This post is about packaging and what an enormous part it plays in creating that sense of anticipation, of setting the stage for the goodies inside. Apple has this down to a very fine art indeed. Every single thing you buy from them looks like a delicious-red-Apple present to yourself. Their sleek black and silver minimalist boxes express supreme confidence. And that other well-known shiny blue one with the discreet black graphics from Tiffany & Co. needs no introduction. Apple doesn’t have to shout or do visual pirouettes, because what’s inside the package is so friggin’ fabulous, and then there’s that Tiffany blue, and we all know what that means. The box says it all.

YOU DON’T GET A SECOND CHANCE TO MAKE A FIRST IMPRESSION

If you’ve ever watched What Not To Wear, Stacy and Clinton are all about enhancing the impression a woman makes by how she dresses (packages) herself. And they never, ever forget about those all-important accessories – or the value of a great haircut and a dab of make up. (Neither do we.) Don’t get all feminist on me about this, because you can’t possibly outdo me in that arena. Yes, it’s what’s inside that matters, we all know that, but if that costly Apple gear or irresistible bauble from Tiffany’s came in anonymous brown boxes, without so much as a touch of lip gloss, you might just be asking yourself if it’s worth the bother to look inside.

THE PACKAGING EQUIVALENT OF GODIVA AND RED ROSES

It doesn’t take a genius to see that these two make a serious effort to get and keep your attention. They know that no one gets a second chance to make a first impression – and that applies equally to people and products alike. Apple and Tiffany are masters of seduction and tell the truth, you love it. It’s the packaging equivalent of Godiva and red roses. In that vein, I’ll have more to say on the subject of the women on the LPGA tour and how many of them are missing this important point altogether. They could do with a bit more spit and polish and little less plain brown wrapping. Yes, and lip gloss. I said it. I’ll try to wrestle that alligator to the ground later, so stay tuned.

THE BOX SAYS IT ALL

Back to seductive packaging and that important wow factor. I want all of you to have the same sensation when you receive a shipment from us, as you do when you get your new iPhone or spy that unmistakable blue box under the Christmas tree. You’ve given yourself the gift of golf by buying the best shoes (and gloves) on the planet and we want the whole experience to be like Christmas morning. There won’t be a pink bow to linger over, and no Betsy Wetsy inside, but the anticipation will be every bit as thrilling, because that crisp lime green and houndstooth box is just the amuse-bouche for the main course inside. There’s nothing ordinary about it, because the products inside are out of this world. You won’t be able to wait to tear off the lid and ravage the tissue paper inside to reveal your heart’s desire. It’s going to be everything you dreamed of, better than Betsy. So obvious.

GIFT WITH PURCHASE

And when you’ve caught your breath from the first tsunami of delight at the shoes and glove you just purchased, you’ll see that we’ve enclosed a little something extra that you weren’t expecting – a pair of cloth shoe bags, one for each shoe – to make traveling a pleasure-filled convenience. Consider it our gift to you on this momentous occasion: the first day of the rest of your life with blissfully comfortable and unbearably chic feet!